*sigh*

I know.... Motivation..... where do people find that? not just about the blogging.... I recently stumbled upon a friend's husband's weight loss blog and facebook page. How awesome! He is holding himself accountable to his friends.... I discovered that we have a lot of the same problems.... food is comfort... I've noticed a little weight gain this past semester but I excuse it because of school and work.... I'm good at excuses.... very believable they are.... So.... I'm holding myself accountable to you... So.... I don't want to pay for a gym membership right now because I expect to be moving in a couple months (hopefully after graduation.... FINALLY).... so I'm hoping to start by eating a little better.... I know there are a few websites out there that help with menu planning but my problem is I'm really picky! I ONLY like 2% or higher milk, I don't like pork (occaisionally some bacon), I don't eat that much beef and I feel like every menu on the planet involves pork or beef for every meal! I also am going to need something that offers a grocery list. Quick meals would be good too..... I'm almost to the point of having a diet of entirely raw vegetables lol.... I have a bit more free time this last semester.... apparently the last one was the toughest.... another reason to watch what I eat: I had TWO cavities at my check up with the dentist! TWO! My entire life's cavities more than doubled! :-).... I blame the soda and coffee that I lived on with those 0-2 hours of sleep nights.... Also when your on those websites where you put in what you ate that day and it calculates your calories/fat/protein/etc.... how do you put in something that you made that is a mixture of stuff? Like if I were to make my ratatouille recipe (amazing by the way) how would i go about putting that in? I dont really understand that... So let me know... I know most of you HAD to have done something like this at least once in your life. Which brings me to exercise.... I'm not about to bite off more than I can chew (I hope) so I'm going to start with the dieting.... I just want the exercise suggestions written down here somewhere.... I don't have a DVD player except my laptop so no DVD suggestions please.... I DO however have a VCR that I apparently think is portable as it gets transferred from bedroom to living room often. I also hate running with a passion. Moving on to personal issues of the mind.... I'm self conscious. Beyond a rational point. Everyone gets nervous going to the gym (holy cow look at that guys pipes or she wears a size zero pants which side note how can someone be a size zero?! thats like you dont exist but whatever) but i get panic attacks going to the grocery store.... and walmart.... and when i'm pumping gas... How do i get over THAT? i'm aware that its NUTS and irrational.... but i can't get beyond it. So... tips on that? last thing i think for the night.... If i don't see results NOW i lose interest.... so i guess it all comes back to motivation? so.... tips, tricks, and ideas.... thats your assignment.... :-D